Friday, September 2, 2011

Part 1: August 20, 2011

To take any pressure off of myself, I will start by saying this is not my official wedding post. But I have been trying for a few weeks now to embrace my thoughts, whatever they may be. This special time in our relationship is fleeting and I have tried very hard to live in the moment, to not stress too much about the details, and to try to remember as much as I can. The best way to remember for me is to write.

Everybody offers advice whether or not it is solicited and some of the questions have surprised me. Post wedding, the number one question: what went wrong? any big mishaps?

The answer: no.

The extended answer: anything that "went wrong" was more than made up for. The way things played out was not always what we planned but always ended up being better than what we could have thought up. For example, our officiator announced us as husband and wife, everybody cheered, and the music quickly started up. In all of the excitement the officiator did not get a chance to tell us to kiss and as he is blind, may not have known that we did not. So I leaned in and said "Tommy you forgot to have us kiss."

To which Tommy threw his hands up and shouted, "Stop the music!" The music abruptly went quiet and Tommy got his chance to tell us to kiss, at which the crowd broke out into even louder cheering and the music resumed. I loved it! It was fun. It was perfect.

I have spent so much time since the wedding thinking about moments. Asking myself questions about favorite parts, things I want to hold onto, what would I change? What unsolicited advice will I offer to the bride after me?

Something that bothered me wedding week, and it probably seems silly, is that I never got emotional. I never cried. If you know me, you know that I cry easily. If you don't, let me say that I will cry anytime I see somebody else crying. This includes reality TV stars.

Nick told me a number of times that he was putting effort into "keeping it together" and a part of me longed to just fall apart with the feeling of love and happiness and an understanding of what it all means. Instead I just stood around and smiled like a dope (see below).

Maybe as the wedding gets further away, I will have better perspective. For now my reason is that leading up to the wedding Nick spent a lot of time by himself. He was in his hotel room the morning of the wedding writing me a letter when it "finally hit" for him.

I spent that morning surrounded by my girls. My Mom, sisters, niece, cousin, sister-in-law, friends, hair and makeup artist, and a frenzy of random visitors were by my side attempting to attend to my every need. (It's okay, I can lift my arm to drink my oj. But thanks.)

In all honesty, I would not have had that morning play out any other way. What kept me so calm was the happiness of seeing these people that I love so much, supporting me and getting to know each other better. (The people in that room came from six different states to be there. If you are reading this and most of your close friends and family live close to each other, please take a moment to recognize how lucky you are!! If you and your significant other have family in similar areas, please acknowledge, you are also very lucky!!!) Okay now that I have stepped off of my soap box - what I'm trying to say is when I really think about everything that happened, from the time we landed in Boston until the day we flew back to Minneapolis, I would not have changed a thing.

Like most girls, I have had thoughts about what my wedding would be like since I was little. Every time I went somewhere beautiful, I was secretly storing it in my mind as a possible location. Where I wanted to get married shifted drastically. I have thought everything from a wedding on the beach in Hawaii to the top of a mountain in New Hampshire to a park in Australia and ended up in a ballroom in downtown Boston.

The one thing that never shifted was a dream to have my wedding be an event. I did not want it to be one day. I wanted to do a destination purely because it would force everyone to hang out for an extended period of time. It is funny to think of having a destination wedding in your hometown but that is what ended up happening. When I think back on my wedding, I do not think of just August 20th. I think about everything in between. From connolis in the North End and dancing at the oldest bar in America to taking my nine-year-old brother-in-law on his first train ride to playing in the fountains with my niece from lunch on Newbury Street to napping in the hammock at my parents house.

So much more I want to share but I will hold out hopefully for some professional photos. Have a good Labor day weekend!

1 comment:

  1. So good to hear that you enjoyed the day as much as we did :-) Can't wait to read more about your wedding reflections.. and I didn't cry at my wedding either, in case you wanna normalize that.