Tuesday, October 8, 2013

For Her: For Me

 A few weeks ago, I was hanging out with a few girl friends and we were discussing why women are not able to take a compliment. A few minutes later, my friend told me that I looked fantastic. I immediately shot her down and expressed frustration with trying to lose baby weight. She called me out for doing exactly what we were just talking about.

I have realized since that night, how often I practice negative self talk. It happens almost every day.

When I found out that I was having a girl, it focused my mind to a set list of joys and worries. I want to protect her but not in such a way that she is not able to experience the world. I want to hold her up and not hold her back. I worry about boys breaking her heart and friends breaking her trust. I worry about the pressure that is put on girls to look a certain way.

I have spent a lot of time thinking about what I can do to combat some of the challenges that she will face. I have come up with one seemingly simple answer. Nick and I need to develop her confidence. I want to send her out in the world with the knowledge of who she is and all she has to offer. If she knows her strength, power, and beauty she will be able to make better decisions. She will be able to walk away from troublesome boys, weak friendships, and damaging choices.

Children practice what you do but not always what you say. With this in mind, I have decided to break myself of negative self talk. If I tell her how wonderful she is and then knock myself down, the message is muddled. When I catch myself saying something critical, I replace it with something positive. If I can change the statement, I hope to eventually change the message.

I challenge you to be mindful of your own internal communication for one day. 

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