Unexpected Story: Wine Glasses

Last date in Observatory Park in 2004

In November 2004, Nick and I went on a date in Sydney. It was our last date before the end of our trip. The end of the five months when we met, fell in love, and went on the most incredible adventures. We walked the streets that had become so familiar and stopped in a number of stores to gather items for a picnic. We even stopped in a small gift shop and purchased two beautifully painted wine glasses. Late that afternoon we headed to our favorite park in the city and stayed for hours. We drank wine out of our new glasses, watched the sunset, and talked about what would happen next.

A week later, Nick left Australia. When I returned to my dorm room after saying goodbye, I found a note on my desk. In it, he explained that since we couldn't be in the same place right now, our wine glasses would stay together and we would pass them between us. Since we had planned that I would visit him in Minnesota over the New Year, he would bring the glasses home with him until that time, and so on.

New Year's Eve Party 2005. Australian wine glasses.

Sure enough, on December 31st Nick and I were at party in Minnesota. I was meeting all of his friends and we were drinking from our wine glasses painted with aboriginal art. A few hours and glasses of wine later, my glass was sitting on the kitchen counter when a girl swung her arms out. I watched, as if in slow motion, as my glass shot across the granite and shattered on the floor. Without a thought of composure, I crumpled over the broken shards and cried. I unintentionally made a small scene in front of Nick's friends who did not yet know me. Only a few seconds passed before embarrassment overshadowed my disappointment and I rushed out of the room.

In my absence, Nick's sweet friend, Myles found a tupperware container and swept the pieces into it for me. After I returned to the kitchen, explained myself, reassured everyone that I was fine, and cradled the plastic container- the party resumed.

When I left Minnesota at the end of that week, I did bring the intact wine glass and the tupperware container back to Boston in my suitcase. When I got home, they were packed in a box of fragile items and for years, every move, every apartment, the glass and the tupperware moved with me and then with us.

A few days ago, as I wrote about in this post, I pulled the glass and the tupperware out of the box. I decided that we should start using the one that is not broken and either make something with the broken pieces or finally toss it out.

Last night, we used the glass for the first time in eleven years and right before we went to bed, Nick knocked the glass off a table and it broke into pieces.

I did not crumple. I did not cry. But it wasn't until this morning that I started to laugh about all of this. So now I ask, does anybody have any experience with mosaic?

Both glasses in the tupperware.

Big Things: Focus

Portsmouth

This year, more than any other, seems to carry focus. Not because of some determined resolution but 

because of a path that I have slowly, oh so slowly, been wearing down and creating.

But before I can press my feet into the dirt and continue, I need to take a little bit of time to reflect. A year has ended and a new one has shuffled into place. In reflecting on 2015, the year of balance, it took me a moment to recognize the year as it was. Most of the changes, with some serious exception, are small. A few are light, simple, and fun. But my reason for creating a list is to provide a reminder, context. And in this post of introspection, I realize that 2015 was the year in which this quote proved true:





We rang in 2015 at our house with some of my best college friends. It was wonderful!

A few weeks later, Nick, Emaline, and I flew to Sanibel, Florida with my parents. We rode bikes, collected shells, watched sunsets, drank jai-alai, and swam in the ocean.

While we were there we found out that my Nana Rice was very sick. We wondered if we needed to return home early, but the decision was made for us when a massive snowstorm shut down New England. When we were able to get back,we spent time with my Nana before she passed away.

Nick pulling Emaline through the backyard of the house where my Mom grew up.

My Uncle Paul doing something on the roof. My Nana watching us through the window. The last day we saw her.

On my birthday, we said goodbye to my last grandparent. I wrote about her here. We spent the next few months buried in snow.

When finally the last bit of white melted away, we broke the record for the snowiest winter in Boston's recorded history. And moving forward from that hibernation, I realize now, how many small changes happened then:

• Started a number of house projects 
• Tended the yard and gardens around our home
• Discovered podcasts 
• Continued to simplify, declutter, and slow my home
• Began eating more fruits and veggies with a daily smoothie
• Got myself to enjoy black coffee
• Started wearing lipstick. (It only took me 32 years to decide that I liked the way it looked.) 
• Learned to like cooking a bit more and picked up a few recipes
• Took a painting class
• Attended networking events
• Found a workout class that I really enjoy and have stuck with it. Barre!

In May, we celebrated Emaline's second birthday with a big party at our house and got her a swing-set. A few weeks later, Nick had to go to Amsterdam for a work conference and I took the opportunity to join him. We left Emaline with my Mom and traveled Bruges and Amsterdam for six days. It was a great reminder how much Nick and I love to travel together and want that for our family in the years to come. We also:

• Traveled to Minneapolis three times
• Vacationed on the Cape
• Visited the National Seashore
• Hosted a number of family and friends

The day after we returned from Europe, the organization that I serve as a volunteer board member had our biggest event of the year! We shut down the main street in Portsmouth to host the Stiletto Sprint! A short race run in heels (men and women) to raise money for Big Brothers Big Sisters. It was an incredible event and I am so proud to be a part of it. In our last meeting, I agreed to take a higher position on the board for this coming year.

And at the end of the summer, I got an offer to join a long term writing project. An author who I love and respect is writing a historical fiction novel and has asked me to research and edit. I officially started on September 1st and it is the best!

In addition to this list, are the countless days I have spent with Emaline. Often we are in pajamas, playing hide and seek or babies or kitchen or coloring or singing or freeze dancing. I will admit that sometimes Emaline has to say "Mama, play with me!" before I decide that it is okay to stop what I am doing (this included) and be with her completely. But every night when I squeeze her in my arms before tucking her in, I know this is a time to cherish. And I do. She is no longer a baby but a little person. She is smart, funny, thoughtful, and curious. She counts, sings, knows her colors and letters, uses a high-pitched voice when we play pretend. Every day she does something that just pulls on my heart. This morning she hid stuffed animals in Nick's jacket pocket to surprise him when he went to work.

So 2016, I am ready for you. 2016 is the year of focus. Travel. Finances. Family. Friends. Writing.

Happy New Year!

Summer: Full House

This shall be known as the summer of hosting!

I typically feel guilt when this much time passes without showing my blog some love but this summer was full (hard to believe it's almost a year since this) and the time that I did have to write, I gave to my novel.

The house is quiet for the moment and we have fallen back into a rhythm. But as I notice the date, it seems to signify the end of summer. So I pause to take stock of my favorite season.

As a family we managed one trip to Minnesota, three trips to Cape Cod, numerous beach days, countless hours of yard work, and five (soon to be six) sets of visitors!

We have had house guests nearly nonstop since the beginning of July. As a result, everything has existed around providing a welcoming home and making the most of time together.

I am so grateful to have friends and family that are willing to take time to travel and stay with us. As I have written before, it is powerful when somebody you love is able to step into your everyday and sample your life.

It is looking at life through another lens. And it affords the opportunity to to be a tourist in my own town. It is an excuse to not waste the summer-  the best restaurants and beaches and outdoor concerts and harbor cruises and painting classes and barbecues. It allows a fall back into comfortable friendships and builds new memories.

The beds have been cleared yet again. The laundry and dishes put away. The house- reset. 

Now I write it down. 

But the heat lingers and we likely have a few more days of salt and sand before the season sneaks away. So I embrace each day and try to remember everything that we did. 

Travel: Like Writing

Bruges, Belgium. 

 On a Wednesday evening a few weeks ago, Nick and I left Emaline with my parents and boarded a plane to Amsterdam. As the trip neared, I received one of two questions: "Are you excited?" or "Are you scared to leave Emaline?" I have never been good at answering questions of this type. The honest response is trickier than expected so I just say "yes."

Emaline carried my picture in her pocket the day before I came home.

I thought about not going. I allowed waves of guilt and fear to follow me around. I polled friends and family expecting somebody to tell me what I wanted to hear. I looked at my child and knew that I would not see anything in this world as wonderful as her little face. I could not imagine being away from her for six days because we are always together and I don't want to miss even a minor change. It happens so quick. But as I lifted her from my shoulder and placed her in bed, I thought about how I wanted her to see me.

I paused the fear and the judgement and just focused on her and I. And I realized that I need to give her the best version of myself. And for me, part of that is travel.

I recently read Yes Please  and the words that stick with me are, "good for you, not for me." How I parent is not the same as how you parent. How I live my life is not the same as you live your life. And that's totally cool! I need to stop trying to meet some invisible expectation. When I let go of public perception, decisions are much simpler. The answer: Travel, like writing, makes me better. The same reason that I went, might be the same reason that another parent chooses to stay.

Nick and I are both a little better after an adventure than the version of ourselves who began. We push ourselves to new places, collect experiences, and step out of routine to look at a shiny new world.

And like that, the fear settled. It did not go away, but I was able to package it up and stow it beneath my seat. I still cried on the way to the airport and I still felt a knot in my chest whenever a small child passed us on the streets of Europe. But as our train rolled through the Belgian countryside I felt light. I took in the beauty of the area and thought about telling Emaline all about this when she gets a little older.  

IAMSTERDAM

A real Belgian waffle

New Flemish friends in Bruges, Belgium 

Guest Post: Australia's Best Wine Regions

To end the week of guest posts, we have an entry that incorporates three of my favorite things: Australia, wine, and my friends. Two of my closest friends spent a few years traveling the world and documented everything on their blog, LivingIF. You can also follow their adventures and sage advice by liking them on Facebook, here. If you are planning to travel or you want to get lost at your desk for a moment, enjoy!

Personal vineyard tours, tastes of prized vintages and tastings poured by the winery owner are what we all wish for when exploring a new wine region.  In the Adelaide Hills and Coonawara wine regions of Australia personal service is expected.  While McLaren Vale and Hunter Valley among others get all the attention these two lesser known areas are worth your time.

In each of the places we stopped in Coonawara and Adelaide Hills we were given individualized attention and provided with stellar service. We explored the small towns of Hahndorf near Adelaide Hills and Naracoorte near Coonawara.  Each region with the side trips is a full day and will require a car, but you won’t regret it.  Below are the highlights of our wine tours in each region.

ADELAIDE HILLS

Hahndorf
The delightful little town of Hahndorf is the perfect place for lunch between tastings, to pick up picnic items or to feed that chocolate craving.  The main road makes it easy to avoid getting lost and will take you past both Udder Delights and N5 Chocolate Shop.  Even if you have no plans to purchase anything you have to stop into Udder Delights for their fantastic samples.  The chocolate shop on the other hand is where you want to spend your money with truffles starting at an affordable $2 and plenty of other indulgent treats that are easy on your wallet and divine on your tongue.  The Honey Pot truffle, a Belgian milk chocolate “hive” filled with honey and ganache is a must-try.



The Lane Vineyard
With over 20 wines to choose from on their tasting list you’re bound to find something that strikes your palette.  If you don’t know where to start just let The Lane Vineyard’s excellent and informed staff guide you.  The all glass tasting room surrounded by vineyards creates a beautiful backdrop for their wonderful array of wines.  The Lois Blance de Blances white sparkling was particular favorite with a crisp, clean finish.

Ekhinda
 Our experience at Ekhinda is what you dream of when visiting a winery.  The wines were sensational with robust, fruity reds, refreshing whites and even their own craft beer on tap.  But what made our visit so special was a hands on lesson from the owner and vintner along with a private tour of the vineyard.  We couldn’t help but linger, in part due to the generous pours from the fun, knowledgable and charismatic tasting staff and part because we couldn’t get enough of the “she viper.”  This full bodied Grenache, Shiraz blend is to die for, maybe that’s why it’s call the she viper

  

COONAWARA

Naracoorte
This UNESCO World Heritage site is just 28 kilometers from the Coonawara Wine Region and is home to Naracoorte Caves National Park.  The bat cave is one of just two caves in Australia that Southern bent-winged bats use to raise their young.  During the summer months, over 30,000 bats emerge from the cave at dusk to feed on flying insects. While this may be a turn-off for some, these guys are helping you out by getting rid of those pesky mosquitoes.  The park staff lead a guided tour of the bat cave, but if you are just interested in the mass bat exodus each evening you can show up at dusk to see for yourself.  They light the cave entrance allowing you a fleeting glimpse of bats flying out of the cave in every direction.

Rymill
The welcoming woman working the tasting counter at Rymill immediately drew us in and had it not been our first stop we would have stayed much longer.  From her detailed wine descriptions to her explanation of cork vs. rubber wine stoppers we thoroughly enjoyed our tasting.  My personal favorite was quite aptly named “The Bees Knees” and was a delicious blend of Cabernet Sauvignon and Merlot.

Wynns
The laid back tasting at Wynns was made all the more entertaining by the two tasting staff that played off each other superbly.  It would be hard to pick a favorite at this red-heavy winery, but the 2009 (54th vintage) Cabernet Sauvignon was amazing.
While all the guidebooks will steer you towards McLaren Vale, opt for a more personal experience in the smaller regions of Adelaide Hills and Connawara.  Not only will you enjoy the small town charm of Naracoorte and Hahndorf, but you’ll meet some of the best tasting room staff Down Under.

Guest Post: Travelling With Intent

Today's post comes from my friend Sam. You may remember that yesterday was her 30th birthday or that I have written about trips to her hometown in North Dakota not once, but twice! When we met, it clicked faster than any other friendship post-college. My life in Minnesota would not be half as fun, if not for her. She can also sing, act, play guitar and piano, and never fails to make me laugh..  

Sam and I hanging out in North Dakota.

When I was a kid, I thought I was super lame because I had only been to two states (Minnesota and North Dakota). Unless you counted the ten minutes I had spent with my parents driving through a corner of South Dakota. Then it was three. Three whole states in my ten years of life. I was a failure.

When my friends would speak of their travels to far-off places like Wisconsin or Iowa where they’d traveled, I couldn’t fathom the distances they had gone; the exotic places they had seen; the well-rounded 6^th graders they had become. I was so boring and grounded. My parents never went anywhere, and I was a less interesting person because of it. 

Well, as the years passed and I matured into a carefree college student, I discovered that the key to travelling lay within one simple concept: Adult Autonomy.

The first time I ever traveled outside of the United States to something more interesting than Canada was during my junior year of college back in 2005 for a study abroad program that entailed going to the continent of Europe for a majority of the spring semester. The trip was adequately named “Eurospring” and I signed up for it because I was in charge of my life now, and God be damned if I wasn’t going to become cool by going somewhere far away.

I also might have signed up because everyone else was doing it and I hadn’t “found” myself yet and maybe, just maybe,  “I” was hiding somewhere in Europe.

 Of course I had never really dreamt of going to Europe, in particular. The boring English sitcoms that my parents watched on PBS hadn’t really rubbed off on me and as a result I had no desire to experience funny accents or driving on the left side of the road. But this was a trip that would look amazing on my travel resume. I’d surely emerge from this experience a better and more brilliant person. Seven countries in two months, visiting famous landmarks, frolicking in the London fog; it sounded like the perfect concoction for worldliness.  My excitement began to grow as our takeoff date grew near. The preliminary travel sessions we attended for the program were filled with helpful information for Americans visiting Europe for the first time: Europeans don’t wear jeans, so don’t bring any unless you want to stand out. Europeans don’t switch their fork to their right hand when eating, so learn to eat continentally. Europeans hate Americans so say you’re from Canada when approached by one. Unless you’re in France. Then you’re screwed

Eurospring with Sam on the far left.

.Armed with this sage advice, I and all of my friends hopped on a plane en route to Heathrow and proceeded to do everything that you could possibly do in Europe over the course of two months. I saw castles and dungeons and Stonehenge and the Vatican and the Eiffel Tower. I visited London 9 separate times and rode a bicycle through Paris. I ferried across the English Channel and swam in the Adriatic Sea. I spent pounds and euros and crowns and I drank beer and wine and absinthe. 

So much absinthe. 

After two months of apparent European bliss, I returned to the US as, what I envisioned, a savvy globetrotter who had tons of worldly experience.  As my boyfriend’s mom drove us home from the airport I was surprised by how big everything in America was. Buildings, cars and even the roads they drove on seemed unnecessarily large because I had grown so used to Europe’s smaller scale. Home was almost foreign to me and I felt like I had conquered being a well-travelled citizen.

 But by the time we got home, the only thing that seemed to be still affecting me from my European adventure was the jet lag that was conveniently allowing me to wake up at 6am. In regards to my worldly transformation, I felt like I had always felt: like myself. 

Since that trip, I’ve visited Europe six separate times on my own. Each one of those trips lasted just a fraction of the time that I spent there during my study abroad, but each of those little jaunts across the pond had more of an effect on me than the two months I spent there during my junior year of college. 

Sam on the far left, hanging out in the Azores.

Why? Because, I learned to travel with intent. After I graduated, I somehow became lucky enough to have friends and family who lived abroad and I decided to make the most of my long distance relationships. I took advantage of their hospitality and got to see a more intimate portrayal of the same far off lands I had visited in college. I took my time and nurtured the relationships I had with my friends and family rather than worry about seeing and doing everything. As a result, I relaxed into my temporary surroundings and became acquainted with some of the locals, so much so, that I had an international love affair for the better part of 2011 and played music in a Portuguese bar just last year. In finding a reason to travel that was more than “I should do it, everyone else is”, I found more satisfaction in what I experienced and actually did learn something about myself: I am who I am, and I can embrace that and be happy.

All of that advice in our travel sessions before Eurospring seemed to be geared towards hiding the fact that we were Americans, which I’ve learned since, is impossible to do if you are indeed an American in Europe. (It’s even more difficult to do when you’re an American college student with 30 other American college students riding around in a vehicle labeled “Eurobus” for two months.)  Throughout my independent travels, I’ve come to accept that my nationality is something I can’t change and is a significant part of who I am, just like so many other facets of myself. Travelling with intent taught me that it’s ok to be you and you shouldn’t have to worry about what anyone else thinks about it.

Showered: Boston Baby

 The last weekend in February, Nick and I flew to Boston for my baby shower. It was great to be home and strange to know that it was my last trip before the baby arrives. 

My Mom called a few days before we flew out to let me know that a snow storm was expected the night before and the day of the shower. We did not have options for changing dates, so I tried to not think much about the weather. As the day approached, the storm became eminent but the severity lessened.

Snow covered backyard.

 It was the kind of snow that stuck to the trees and made for a really pretty backdrop. In the end, it deterred only one guest. Friends and family arrived from Connecticut, New York, Cape Cod, New Hampshire, and all over Massachusetts. I am so grateful to have people in my life who are willing to travel and celebrate this exciting time. I also have to say how awesome my parents and sisters are for putting it all together. They cleaned, cooked, and decorated like crazy. My Dad spent hours shoveling snow banks so there would be enough parking spots. My Mom cooked almost all of the food by herself. My older sister filled the house with decorations. And my little sister picked up odd jobs and lent me shoes. And last but not least, Kaia placed her blanky across the couch in case anybody got tired and wanted to take a nap.

Tracey, Nana Rice, Mom, Me, Kaia, Christine

Love my friends!

Showers in my family do not entail any games. We gather, talk, eat, and drink. Other than the gift opening, it feels like a regular party. It is great and I'm glad that nobody had to guess how round I am. No offense to people who love games, it's just not my thing.

Photo taken before my Dad and b.i.l. snuck Nick out to the bar.

Kyla and Kaia

 I am also grateful to have little kids and babies to take some of the attention. I named Kaia "shower captain" and let her know that her job was to entertain people. At the last moment, she told me she wanted to be called "shower fairy" but would still help open the gifts. As people came in the door she would announce that "another customer arrived".

 Leaving Boston this time was really hard. Mainly, I have a hard time imagining all of the changes my life will take before I go home again. I will deliver a baby. I will become a mom. And I will have all of that happen while my family is far away. I always thought I would be back in Boston when this time came. But life has taken me somewhere unexpected. The shower in Boston was a great reminder of the support that I do have, even if I do not get to see those people everyday.

I cannot wait for summer and my next trip to Boston. I cannot wait to dress her in one of the many Red Sox onesies we received and bring her to the beach for the first time. When that happens, I will think back to now and although only a few months will have gone by, life will be so new and I will have traveled so far.