Devote Yourself: March Forth

Today is the only day of the year that is a command. I know that because it is also my wonderful friend Erica's birthday. She wrote a guest post here and I wrote about her here. Her birthday on this day makes so much sense. Quotes about being brave and travelling have a tendency to remind me of her. She knows how to move through life and embrace each new experience. It is something I truly admire. Happy birthday dear friend!

What are you doing to march forth in your life?

Nick was working on our taxes today and filed me as an official business. Pretty cool!

Also, the other day my SIL Elise (whose Etsy shop is here) and I submitted an application to sell cold press coffee at the Portsmouth farmer's market. Cross your fingers that Lula Cold Press will debut this summer!

And finally, I have mentioned briefly before that I serve as a volunteer board member for a group called YP4M. It is a junior board for Big Brothers Big Sisters. 

Because you've probably heard of BBBS but maybe don't know exactly what they do or who they are, I'll share this snippet from their website:

For more than 100 years, Big Brothers Big Sisters has operated under the belief that inherent in every child is the ability to succeed and thrive in life. As the nation’s largest donor and volunteer supported mentoring network, Big Brothers Big Sisters makes meaningful, monitored matches between adult volunteers (“Bigs”) and children (“Littles”), ages 6 through 18, in communities across the country. We develop positive relationships that have a direct and lasting effect on the lives of young people.

And YP4M functions in support of this mission. The biggest way we contribute is to put on one large fundraising event each year- the Stiletto Sprint. It is a 40 yard dash in high heels in the middle of downtown to raise money and awareness for a great cause. We rely on corporate sponsors, race registrations, and general donations to reach our goal. And the money goes a long way to support Big Brothers Big Sisters of New Hampshire. 

All of this to say that I am excited and so grateful to be working on such wonderful projects!

Sunday in October: Little Bits of Magic

It is Sunday and football is on. We have nothing planned today and I am happy for it. We will take on a few house projects and hang out as a family. I will write and we will cook dinner together. Days like this are not as common as we would like but so nice when they occur.

This fall Emaline is getting into the season, seemingly collecting baby pumpkins, painting them, placing them on the steps, and repeating the process every time it rains and the paint runs off. I love sitting with her on the deck as she focuses on putting just the right amount of blob and swirl on each little pumpkin.

 

And my addiction to Netflix documentaries continues. My recent favorites are Maidentrip and Hungry for Change. The second, pushed me into a smoothie kick. I really enjoy stuffing handfuls of leafy greens, carrots, and fruit into our Big Boss blender. I know I am doing something good for myself and it really does taste great! 

All of this

Becomes this.

I am most of the way through Big Magic and love it! I knew I would. Elizabeth Gilbert is one of my all time favorites. I have written about her podcast, her TedTalk, and her books. She is wise and honest and her opinions on art and creativity are so refreshing.

This book could not have come at a better time. I have been met with a very special writing opportunity and have appreciated the encouragement as I begin a new adventure. I will be able to share details with the blog very soon!

**And speaking of creative living, my awesome SIL has opened up an etsy shop! You can check out Smudge Guest Books HERE. Babies, engagements, showers, weddings, little kid birthday, personalized art. Elise is offering a special offer for Write to Simplicity readers. If you order before the end of October and mention this post, you will receive 10% off your order!

Summer: Full House

This shall be known as the summer of hosting!

I typically feel guilt when this much time passes without showing my blog some love but this summer was full (hard to believe it's almost a year since this) and the time that I did have to write, I gave to my novel.

The house is quiet for the moment and we have fallen back into a rhythm. But as I notice the date, it seems to signify the end of summer. So I pause to take stock of my favorite season.

As a family we managed one trip to Minnesota, three trips to Cape Cod, numerous beach days, countless hours of yard work, and five (soon to be six) sets of visitors!

We have had house guests nearly nonstop since the beginning of July. As a result, everything has existed around providing a welcoming home and making the most of time together.

I am so grateful to have friends and family that are willing to take time to travel and stay with us. As I have written before, it is powerful when somebody you love is able to step into your everyday and sample your life.

It is looking at life through another lens. And it affords the opportunity to to be a tourist in my own town. It is an excuse to not waste the summer-  the best restaurants and beaches and outdoor concerts and harbor cruises and painting classes and barbecues. It allows a fall back into comfortable friendships and builds new memories.

The beds have been cleared yet again. The laundry and dishes put away. The house- reset. 

Now I write it down. 

But the heat lingers and we likely have a few more days of salt and sand before the season sneaks away. So I embrace each day and try to remember everything that we did. 

Hard Words: What I Carry

I have to write a post. If I write one then I am able to write another and then another. I have not forgotten about my blog. I have avoided it.

My last grandparent, Nana Rice passed away in February and I knew that my next post had to address that loss and so I wrote nothing.

My Nana Rice lived her entire life on one street. Her family was very close and many of the cousins and siblings still live only a few houses away. The neighbors who were not relatives, soon became like family. My grandparents were the couple that hosted social events and included everyone. They loved traditions and big gatherings and thought nothing of throwing a last minute party.

Today is Easter. We spent it with my Mom's family, the people who are feeling her absence the most. My grandparents had four kids, 10 grandchildren, and two great-grandchildren. And when we are all together, we fill the room with stories, sarcasm, and laughter. It is easy to see that we are existing in a space crafted by my grandparents. And so it was nice. But it is still not easy.

My Nana was kind and generous and hilarious! Every time I was with her, she made me laugh. It was the way she observed the world. She said things in a straight forward manner and ended sentences with laughter. When she laughed, she scrunched her whole face as though she was crying. The harder she laughed, the more it appeared as though she was crying. My Mother does the same thing. It makes them look so sad when they are so joyously happy. And it makes everyone else laugh harder.

I swear she is laughing in this photo!

Her laughter was contagious and made everything feel lighter, more manageable.
The last time I saw her I asked, "How are you feeling?"
She answered, "Terrible!" But then she laughed. A sincere chuckle that made me wonder if she was actually fine or if she just knew how to find a moment for release.

I think of this small interaction often. I take so much from her. She was a woman that had it figured out: enjoy life, gather the people you care about most, raise a family that supports one another, and find laughter when nothing else can be done.

I love my family.

New Home: First Christmas

December swept by with such force that I have just now caught my breath. I wrote this post on December 8th and never pressed publish. The holidays are always busy but with Nick travelling for work and us travelling for Christmas, we reached new speed. So in an effort to remember, I am posting now without change to my previously written words.

We spent this weekend getting our new house Christmas ready. On Saturday, we bundled Emaline in a tiny sleeping bag and took her on her first wagon ride. We pulled our all-terrain Radio Flyer down the street to a local flower shop and bought a Christmas tree.

On previous years, my choosing method was to find the fattest tree that I could find. It has not always worked out well. This year I picked one that is skinny but full. It is the best tree we have had in years! For the walk home, I carried the baby sack and Nick pulled the tree which had been tied to the wagon. If only Norman Rockwell could have seen us!

That night my parents came to spend the night. I have heard that the Portsmouth tree lighting is the best day of the year and I was so excited to check it out. unfortunately, the lighting and holiday parade were cancelled because of rain. So we went out for a nice dinner and then came home to decorate the tree, listen to Christmas music, and sip Bailey's on ice. It was great. My Mom also gave me a lesson on putting on Christmas lights. Her tips:

1. Start at the top
2. Hang the lights loose and away from the trunk
3. Step back often and fuzz your eyes to check spacing

Now to finish shopping and get some present under the tree. Merry Christmas!

Did you miss these holiday posts?

New Year: One Word

A few weeks ago, I told Nick about an author who intentionally lives each year carrying a one word theme. Growth. Change. Fun.

Nick caught me off guard today by asking if I chose my word. It was an interesting idea but I hadn't intended to pick a word. Usually I am able to identify themes only in hindsight, after the surprise twists of time begin to make sense. But as he asked me, the word rolled forward as though called upon and letters bolded in my mind.

Balance.

A little bit more and a little bit less of all of the parts of my life that matter. I walk a tightrope carrying all of the things that I hold dear. It is easy to forget to look up, to lose my footing, to not stop for a breath. Balance.

Happy 2015. May you find your word, whether you know it or not.  


Also, I keep thinking about this post from a few years ago and this one as well.

Guest Post: My SIL the Artist

Elise and Emaline

The final guest post is from my sister-in-law (SIL). She is Nick's sister and one of my best friends. She comes from a long line of male engineers but breaks away from the pack with creativity and ease. Elise is kind, thoughtful, laid-back, and so talented. She teaches art to kids- kindergarten through twelfth grade.

For my friend's daughter's birthday. I asked for simple flowers. Perfect.

Art comes so easily to her. She has gifted me a few pieces and at times, I have commissioned her work. She creates beautiful pieces and shares it with a casual grace that leads me to believe, she does not know how amazing she is. For my wedding and again for my baby shower, she made me a dot art photo. They are the best! I'll let her explain:

Baby Shower Guest Book. The tree reminds me of something from Winnie the Pooh.
Childlike and imaginative. Love

Wedding Guest Book. I love this hanging in my house.

Wedding. Engagement party. Baby-shower. Best friends’-kid’s-Frozen themed –birthday party. House warming. Diaper kegger.

As I inch further into my late twenties I've found that my calendar gets filled with these adult-ish mile-markers and events. I’m coming to realize that I am, in fact, old enough for all of it. With this party maturation that’s happening the ante has been upped for proper gift-giving.

I feel I've been acclimating quite well to it all and I've learned that with these grown-up events you ought to be kind and get a thoughtful gift. I can’t even remember where I saw the idea initially; maybe it was someone who brought the concept to my attention, but one way or another I began making finger-print guest books. It was all a little out of the blue, but making these guest books felt completely natural.

Birthday Party!

A finger print guest book isn't really a guestbook, but more like a sleeker evolved version of that idea. All of your party-goers stamp their fingerprint onto the work and sign their name on top. The collected fingerprints complete a picture and create a beautiful representation of all the support and love shared at that particular time and place. I love giving these guest books to my friends. They’re unique, made with my own hands, and beautifully functional. It feels great creating something special for the ones I love. I’m loving all of these new additions to my calendar.

 Bring on the parties that start at noon and end promptly at three.

Thank you Elise! And thanks again to all the creative minds who shared their craft! Your talent, though varied and unique, helps me remember why it is so important to follow your passion!

Did you miss: Rachel Running Wild? Theresa's gift? Ashley's makeup tip? This amazing song?

Practice: Peonies for Emaline

I have written the obligatory post about our move and everything that goes along with it. But I'm not ready to share. Because of the move and everything that goes along with it, I have not been writing. And the first few times writing after having not written, are a little bit like getting off crutches. I am weak and shaky and my muscles needs to build along with my confidence. So borrowing a little bit of inspiration from one of my favorite bloggers, I am writing a practice post. I will publish it as my warm-up, my opening act. Not to build expectations, please don't do that. But to get my fingers moving and my writer-brain slowly turning. So for the moment, I will pretend that I am not 1,200 miles from Nick's family, an hour from my family, and five minutes from the ocean.

A picture to pull you into a new topic. Emaline!

Emaline's first birthday is in less than a week! Nothing in the world messes with the passage of time more than a child. This year has flown by runs parallel in truth to that feels so long ago. Nick and I keep repeating these statements as we prepare to celebrate. We are having a party for her on Saturday and her actual birthday is on Tuesday. I have a Pinterest board of ideas. We will see what plans come to fruition. I know I want flowers, and balloons, and to decorate her highchair.

What I imagine. But this won't happen. 

I imagined peonies filling the house. When I announced that I was pregnant, I chose peonies as the image to accompany my words because they come into bloom at the same time that my baby was to be born. Yes, there was a lot of thought over that image. And since that time, I have associated those beautiful flowers with my littlest love.

Yesterday, I called the local flower shop and asked if they had any peonies. The lady excitedly told me they were coming in tomorrow. I almost ran for my credit card. This is perfect. I will buy so many. "They are $7.00 a stem." she said breaking through the daydream of my peony house.

"Like per flower? A stem is a flower?" I asked incredulously, realizing only now, how dumb I must have sounded.

After a few beats of silence she responded, "Yes. That's right."

So I am revising my floral plans. I will share some here and when we buy a house (which will be soon but we're not talking about that yet!) I will plant peonies. And every spring when they bloom, I will clip a bunch and put them in a vase for my little girl.

  

Relaunch: Guest Post

It is my first post of 2014! I'm not even bothered by the fact that it is February. The new year has been exciting and busy and full of possibility. My expectations for this year are high and I want to have this space to share all that I can. One of my resolutions is to recommit to this blog. With that, I am kicking off this year with a week of guest posts!

The first one is from my smart, stubborn, funny, beautiful, little lawyer sister. She knows more about style than anybody I know. She is the only person I am featuring that does not have a blog of her own. She could, but that's not really her thing. The post was emailed to me in response to her finding out that I do not own a pair of black dress boots. If you need to shop for boots (and really, who doesn't??) then you need to read this! Thanks Traca!

Tracey and I all dolled up.

 Here are some options to get you started. They vary in price, but a good pair of boots usually don't come cheap (the cheaper boots typically have fake leather so read descriptions if you're curious). 

Keep in mind that often the calf circumference can be a problem (at least for me because I think I have muscular calves) and I usually think it is kind of hard to find a boot that fits well. Some newer styles now make boots where the back of the calf is fabric/elastic so you don't have to worry about the circumference. 

Also it is a good idea to read reviews and do a Google search to make sure you are getting the best deal.  

All this searching makes me want to buy new boots too!  Based on this analysis of potential boots and what to watch for, I would say I may have done too much boot shopping in the past.

http://www.amazon.com/Ivanka-Trump-Womens-Abbott-Leather/dp/B007O0D4PC/ref=sr_1_25?s=shoes&ie=UTF8&qid=1390595382&sr=1-25&keywords=riding+boots+black
 

http://www.zappos.com/rockport-tristina-circle-boot-black

http://www.dsw.com/shoe/tahari+bentley+riding+boot?prodId=280340&category=dsw12cat1730006&activeCats=cat10006,cat20173,dsw12cat1730006

http://www.dsw.com/shoe/white+mountain+lore+riding+boot?prodId=283584&category=dsw12cat1730006&activeCats=cat10006,cat20173,dsw12cat1730006

http://www.zappos.com/lauren-ralph-lauren-melora-black-black-burnished-calf-burnished

http://www.zappos.com/jessica-simpson-elmont-black-silky-kid

http://www.amazon.com/Steve-Madden-Womens-Lynet-Boot/dp/B00BY1GWWE/ref=cts_sh_1_fbt

Happy Shopping!

Love & Loss: My Nana Hannon

Again I went silent. Not because I was keeping a secret, but rather the weight of what I had to say was heavier than my words allowed. I didn't want to just announce the passing of my Nana because I wanted to write in such a way that would honor her. But I know I cannot return to writing until I have shared this momentous loss. And I have realized that my words will never be strong enough to carry my love for her.

I wrote once before about my Nana and her battle with Alzheimer's. It was long and hard and she saw it coming long before it swept her away. She passed away on December 6th, 2013. She lived her last few months at my parent's house and I saw her only a few weeks prior to her death. My family provided care to her that no amount of money could bring. They tended to her with the love and grace that she lived. We knew she was close to the end but she had battled back so many times, it was hard to believe.

The last few days, I waited, knowing what was going to happen. But still, my heart broke when my mom called me on that Friday afternoon. I booked my ticket home and was on a plane the next morning with a baby in my arms.

There are many paragraphs that I have written about this but only a few that I will share. My Nana was many things and private was one of them. I will keep some of my favorite stories tucked away, never to forget.

My Nana was one of the best people I have ever known. She always made me feel loved and it warmed my heart to be in her presence. My Nana was the matriarch. She loved her family and even in sickness, kept us close. She was beautiful and always put together. She loved red lipstick and curlers. She was strong but never loud. She often spoke in a whisper. She loved music and had a pretty voice. She loved tea and toast with jam. She was funny and found laughter easily. She seemed to understand life and knew how to wave away worry. She loved the ocean. She was kind and stubborn and always wanted to help others. Even at the very end, knowing a child was near, made her smile.

She has always been my favorite person for advice. She told me to find a man that treats me well and who makes me laugh. She told me that having fun and laughter will always be important. She was speaking from experience. I asked her once, when her and my Grandpa fell in love. She said she didn't know. She said she didn't know when they met because he was around when they were both children. She remembered him playing baseball 
and that she always loved him. 
She said it so simply. 
It was as if there was no beginning 
and with that, 
no end. 

Pause: Unplanned

 It is Saturday night and I am home thinking about health, wellness, and what's next.

The last few weeks have thrown a number of surprising twists. Unfortunately, most of them have been difficult.

And when you are getting shuffled by life, you hold onto comforts and wait for the ground to stabilize.

Nick and I planned to use this weekend to recover. We wanted to find a nice balance between socializing with friends and family downtime. We had a plethora of potential plans this weekend. So many possibilities that I was overwhelmed at how to spend our time.

It was all for nothing because everything fell through. We turned down some plans and others were cancelled on us. Today's plans got cancelled and uncancelled and cancelled again when Nick came down with a stomach bug. And so I am home, nursing a baby and watching Emaline.

It is not the weekend we intended but maybe, instead of fighting the waves, we need to turn around and let the tide take us back to shore.

No matter what, this girl always makes me happy.

For Her: For Me

 A few weeks ago, I was hanging out with a few girl friends and we were discussing why women are not able to take a compliment. A few minutes later, my friend told me that I looked fantastic. I immediately shot her down and expressed frustration with trying to lose baby weight. She called me out for doing exactly what we were just talking about.

I have realized since that night, how often I practice negative self talk. It happens almost every day.

When I found out that I was having a girl, it focused my mind to a set list of joys and worries. I want to protect her but not in such a way that she is not able to experience the world. I want to hold her up and not hold her back. I worry about boys breaking her heart and friends breaking her trust. I worry about the pressure that is put on girls to look a certain way.

I have spent a lot of time thinking about what I can do to combat some of the challenges that she will face. I have come up with one seemingly simple answer. Nick and I need to develop her confidence. I want to send her out in the world with the knowledge of who she is and all she has to offer. If she knows her strength, power, and beauty she will be able to make better decisions. She will be able to walk away from troublesome boys, weak friendships, and damaging choices.

Children practice what you do but not always what you say. With this in mind, I have decided to break myself of negative self talk. If I tell her how wonderful she is and then knock myself down, the message is muddled. When I catch myself saying something critical, I replace it with something positive. If I can change the statement, I hope to eventually change the message.

I challenge you to be mindful of your own internal communication for one day. 

Birth Certificate: Naming a Person

Our baby girl had a first name long before we met her.

First day home.

As I mentioned in this post, we had a name picked out for a girl but not a boy. We came up with the name maybe even before we were married. I remember shortly after we got engaged, we were in a bar in Madison, Wisconsin and were talking names. And again when we were out to dinner in Stillwater, Minnesota. It seems that the conversations always happen when we get away from home. When we can daydream about the future.

Emaline is a song by Ben Folds. That is where we found the name. As you will hear in the song, her name is pronounced Emma-line. Line rhymes with fine or mine.

I love her name and it fits her well. I'm sure she will earn nicknames as she gets older but for now she's just my Emaline. 

Her middle name took us much longer. We filled out her birth certificate at the last possible moment and even then, were unsure. And when I say we, I really mean that I was not sure.

I thought I knew what her middle name would be months earlier. I had picked one that sounded pretty. But Nick wanted her name to mean something. He wanted family names. His Grandma Valley passed away in November and she meant the world to Nick. He had his heart set on Joann.

My Grandpa Rice passed away when I was 15. He was a poet and a builder and a man of great character. I had always planned to use his name. I thought it would be the middle name of a son but when Nick suggested otherwise, my heart latched onto Gardner.

And so she became:  

Emaline Joann Gardner Valley

Those are her arms inside sleeves that are much too big for her.

Birth Day: Emaline Joann Gardner Valley

Our baby girl arrived in the world on May 13th at 4:01pm.

She weighed in at 6 lbs 4 oz and was 18.6 inches long. Our doctor declared her to be a healthy peanut.

Labor was 10 hours.

Nick was, of course, by my side through everything. He fed me ice chips, rubbed my back, read me messages from friends and family, counted with me, and cried with me the first time we saw our little girl.

The overall labor and delivery experience was more positive than I imagined. The pain was worse.

I had back labor and it was excruciating. At the end of every contraction I collapsed into myself and waited for the next. I swore a lot.

Bless every woman who ventures through labor without an epidural. That woman will never be me.

Epidurals are amazing. Once that was in place, we put on music and I was able to rest a little.

My doctor was great but the nurses were the real rockstars. The few women who watched over me will forever have my gratitude.

At one point, lost in the pain, I forgot why I was there. But when the nurse started warming blankets to prepare for a tiny human to enter the world, it refocused my energy and I cried from excitement.

My Mom and Dad boarded a plane that morning and arrived at the hospital one hour before she was born. My Mom was in the room when her granddaughter arrived.

Nothing in my life will ever compare to seeing my baby for the first time. It was magical and amazing. Somebody told me to look up and when I did, they were holding her above me. She was here! She was healthy and beautiful and mine! They dropped her on my chest and I sobbed.

Everything else faded away. I only remember holding her in total disbelief. I loved her immediately.

Each day is something new and we are still learning to navigate this life. I have a lot more to share but she just started crying so I will leave you with photos since that's probably what you came here for anyway.