2012: Something Else

Photo c/o LivingIf.com

This year is harder to sum up than I thought it would be. There are a few obvious changes that have taken place but I don't think the shift will be completely realized until I am further away from now.

Nick and I started 2012 in such a major way that the year had to be one worth remembering. We were on the roof of our condo in Sydney with some of our greatest friends watching the most amazing fireworks explode over the harbour.

In the weeks that followed Nick and I traveled around Australia visiting old haunts and discovering new treasures. I navigated around Sydney as though I'd been gone for seven days, not seven years. I sat in front of the Opera House and was mistaken for an Australian (woohoo).

Standing in front of my old apartment.

We traveled to Maggie, a tiny island close to the Great Barrier Reef. We hiked to see koalas in the wild and swam on a secluded beach. Nick and I fell in love with the country all over again and made promises to return as often as possible throughout our lives.

Our park on our last night in Sydney.

 A few weeks after Nick and I returned home, I was able to make the final payment on my car loan and my credit card, making 2012 the year that I got to declare myself debt free! It was a goal I worked on for two years and it was incredible to finally check it off.

 In April, we traveled to Mexico for a friend's wedding.  It was beautiful and crazy. Much of our time was spent swimming and drinking but we also took time to visit caves, read in our hammock, snorkel, eat great food, and dance to techno. It was fun to be at a resort with friends and I hope for more trips like that (less tequila) in the future.

I bought a bike this summer and accomplished a 40 and 50 mile ride. Those were a little rough but the shorter trips on the local bike paths were really fun.

 In July, I ran my first 5K. I do not think I could have picked a better first race. We ran/walked the color run! It was a blast. Post-baby, I hope to make races a bigger part of my life.

Elise, Sam, and I. We biked to the run and went swimming after so it was our own version of a triathlon.

Also in July, I took a huge leap and quit my job in order to write full time!! It was awesome! I miss a lot of the people but not my job at all. I have written about it a number of times so I will keep it simple and say- we made the right choice.

With my new schedule, I took ten days at the end of July and beginning of August to go down the Cape with my Dad and help him take care of my Nana. I wrote about that here.

At the end of August and beginning of September, Nick and I went to London and Paris. You can read more about that here. It was our first time in either place and we loved every minute of it.

At the end of September, I found out I was pregnant. It rocked our world. Seeing her ultrasound for the first time, pushed the fear aside to make room for excitement. Disbelief still tries to sneak in, but a steady heartbeat and a growing bump, tell us it is real. We welcome Baby Girl in May!

Mixed with our wonderful news, the fall also brought loss. In October, Duke passed away after being sick for only a few days. It was heartbreaking and we miss him still. At the end of the month, Nick and I flew to Ohio to spend time with Kris and Steve.

The day I returned home from Ohio, Nick's grandmother had a stroke. We spent the next few weeks visiting her in the hospital. She lost the ability to communicate but could hear us and was able to squeeze our hands. A few days before Thanksgiving, she succumbed to her injuries and the world truly lost an angel.

In December, we were able to find out the gender of Baby Valley. Grandma Valley, in the weeks before her stroke, told us emphatically that we were to have a girl. When we went to visit her in the hospital, Nick whispered our girl name. When we went in for the ultrasound, the lady asked me if we had a name. I told her we did if it was a girl and explained. She responded, "Grandma was right!"

Of course she was, how could it be anything else. It was a moment of Grace and knowing that we are to have a little girl is so amazing. It makes me smile, it makes me cry. A few days later, we went to visit our families and shared the news.

Home for Christmas with my parents.

 I wish I had an eloquent way to wrap up this year, to make the loss and the change all mean something. Someday I will look back and see it more clearly. But I have never been so excited to welcome a new year!

Our Old Man: Duke

I am not ready to come back to blogging yet. I am taking an extended and purposeful break. I will come back soon but in the meantime,  I do have one thing that I want to share now. If you know me personally or are a friend on Facebook, you already know.

On Thursday night, after being sick for only a few days. Duke passed away at home. He was 16 years old. We adopted him from Nick's cousins when he was 12, so we have only known him as an old man. That he was sick, that he was old, that he went on his own- none of these things make any of this easier.

If you knew him, you liked him. Visitor's always liked him best right away. There is something about Toby's immediate barking that turns people off, at least for a little bit. Duke just sat back, waited for you to come to him. He was friendly and sweet and gentle and would sleep at your feet after knowing you for just a few minutes. He rarely barked, he liked everyone, and his favorite activities were finding the best spots to sleep, basking in the sun, and eating good food. He knew how to enjoy life. Maybe it was something that came with age, but he got it.

At my bachelorette party, he sought refuge under this umbrella.

Christmas party, most comfortable spot was this single piece of tissue paper.

His last few weeks, he was spending more and more time outside. I would let him outside at 9 or 10 in the morning and at 2 or 3, I would go outside to check on him. The days were getting colder and it was weird that he had not asked to come in. Every time, I found him on the grass, paws stretched in front of him and head lifted to the sun. If I went back out an hour later, new spot, same position. 

He was fairly independent but there were exceptions. He always expected cuddles after a bath and in the last few years, scratched the couch until you pulled him up. His favorite way to cuddle on the couch was to have me squish him behind me, as though he was the big spoon. One time at my birthday party, people were leaning on him thinking he was a pillow. He did not mind but imagine their surprise!

After a bath.

Squeezing in for cuddles.

He was funny in really odd ways. On walks he had no regard for where he went the bathroom. On more than one occasion, he stopped and went in the middle of the street. The waiting cars had no choice but to watch as I quickly cleaned up before moving along..

One time at a friend's barbecue, we were keeping a close eye on Toby (he is known for causing trouble) while Duke roamed the yard. Toward the end of the evening, our hostess shouted in Duke's direction. I looked over to find him rolling in her mint plant. He smelled so good when I pulled him off but I do not know if she ever put those fur covered leaves in the intended mojitos. He smelled like tooth paste for days.

Duke and I did the Walk for Animals maybe 3 years ago. Even then, he was so slow. Like driving with hazard lights on, we kept having to tell people to just go around us. Still he loved it and we walked over 5 miles.

Duke proudly sporting his bandanna after the walk for animals.

 When we first adopted him, he used to hump buckets and planters. He was neutered but could not resist a good pot or empty bucket. It was odd and kinda gross, but really funny.

Watching the Puppy Bowl was one of the few things that really riled him up!

Because he was old and always mellow he got away with a lot. When he heard the dishwasher open, he always came to the kitchen hoping to find some food. It could only have been a few weeks ago that I turned my back, he got his front paws in the dishwasher and was licking dirty spoons. I think it was the same week, I left a kitchen trash bag outside the door to carry out. I went out an hour or so later to find the paper bag torn to shreds and Duke passed out beside a torn paper towel. I would always tell him he knew better in a stern voice as I tried to hold back laughter.

This is the first time that I have gone through this as an adult. It does not get easier. Maybe, it is even harder. I miss him more than I can stand. Everything reminds me of him and most of the time, I think he is napping in the other room.

He was not like most dogs in that he did not so freely give his complete love and trust. It felt like when we adopted him, that we had to earn it. He was set in his ways and not about to change for us. It took time but it was fun these past 4 and a half years watching that relationship grow. I know how much he loved us and I am so grateful that we had the chance to love him.

The only way they would cuddle was butt to butt. Brothers!

Writing Exercise: Interviewing Myself

1. What's something everyone should know how to do?

Carry on a pleasant conversation with someone they do not know well.

2. What's something people should start thinking more about?
When making a purchase, no matter what it is, you are casting a vote for the product, company, etc.



3. What's the best part of your average day?
Coming home to the pups greeting me at the door. Climbing into bed with Nick at night.



4. What's something you would do more often if you had time?
I do not spend much time alone. It's my nature to search out company but I do feel revitalized when I take time to work on my own checklist without influence.



5. What will you never put up with?
I have a very low tolerance for passive aggressive attitude.


6. I have a weakness for...?
Baby animals, small children, champagne, and Nick's cologne.



7. What has changed in your life in the past year?
I moved. I got married. I travelled back to Australia. I paid off my car. I paid off all debt. I made a commitment to move my career forward. We drove Great Ocean Road.



8. What memory will you cherish for the rest of your life?
The first three that came to mind: My first kiss with Nick. Finding out about a surprise trip to Vegas. Kaia spinning my wedding dress.  



9. What makes a friendship last a lifetime?
The best friendships are the ones that don't carry guilt, but rather can pick up where they left off. I never doubt it, I never question it, it's always there and a part of me. Even when I'm far away or we haven't talked for a bit, it makes life a little easier and a lot more fun.



10. What's something that makes you happy?
Finding myself in a puppy sandwich. Catching up with friends. Planning my next trip. Pointing out ugly items in stores and suggesting my friends purchase. Warm weather with sunshine.



11. What's an important ingredient to a healthy relationship?
Communication. Patience. Finding humor in the other person's quirks.



12. What's something you need to practice more?
Not taking everything to heart.



13. What do you always try to avoid?
Mundane tasks. Hand washing dishes.



14. What has this past year taught you?
This quote seems to say it best:




Please feel free to respond with your own answers and to post on your own blog.
All photos c/o Pinterest and my facebook page. Idea c/o Stumble Upon, Marital Bless, and Sam.

Plant, Dog, Child: Step 2 Will Take Longer Than Expected.

You need to keep a plant alive before you should get a dog. You need to keep a dog alive before you should have a child. I heard that somewhere. I don't know where. Even if you don't take it literally it is about taking more responsibility. Nick and I have two dogs and up until a few days ago, I thought we were doing a great job taking care of the boys, now I feel like a terrible parent.

Duke is the older of our two canines. He is a 15 year old West Highland Terrier (westie). His personality is that of a sweet, stubborn, old man. He's content sitting on the deck with his face to the sun and although his hearing is fine, he'll ignore you if he's not ready to come in when called.

In the few years that we have had the boys, Duke's age has started to show itself. He is still happy and loving, wagging his tail and cuddling when he sees fit but he has weird spots on his body, he gets sick easily, and his vision is fading. A while back I started doing vision tests with him, holding food in front of him or waving my hand. His left eye is all white and his right eye maybe has partial vision.

With the thought that he could not really see and that we've been living in subzero temperatures, we let his hair grow out. We let his bangs fall in his face. We let a beetles like shag take over his head and fall into his eyes.

It has been sad watching our clumsy old man trip around that house. He really is getting old and I need to be honest with myself that as his visions get worse, daily tasks will get harder.

Earlier this week, with a break in cold temperature, I decided he was overdue for a haircut and clipped away a pile of hair almost the same size as him and gave him a bath. It was nice to see his sweet brown eye(s) again.

Since the cut and the bath, he has a new spring in his step. He has no trouble finding the back door and even though he's still really slow, he no longer is nervous about going up and down stairs. Turns out the hair cut was the cause of his expedient aging and not the cataracts. He's still our little old man but we need to not look at his age and think that he's any worse that he is.

Sorry Duker. I see a lot of walks and doggy ice cream in your future as Nick and I try to apologize for your bad haircut.

Our Boys: The Search for Duke and Toby

Yesterday I spent lots of money, time, and sanity at the vet. On the drive home as the boys finally settled down, I started thinking about what it took to find our dogs and how having them the past year, really has changed my life.

I grew up with dogs. In my whole life there was only a one year long period in which, I did not have a dog. It was very difficult. I became puppy obsessed. The way others pine for babies or marriage, I was for canines. I had puppy-fever.

It wasn’t too difficult to convince Nick what needed to be done. The hard part was finding a dog. It seems like for most people they go out to "just look" and magically come home with a fury bundle of joy. Not us. Nick is an engineer and therefore a lot of research went into it. He started reading giant textbook like material and learned as much as he could about breeds, training, etc. Meanwhile, I became addicted to sites like petfinder.com and fell in love day after day.

When Nick finally decided we were ready to become dog owners, we went to a "Puppy Meet and Greet". It is exactly what it sounds like.


It was simultaneously the best and worst way to spend a Saturday. You spend the whole time playing with insanely cute puppies but you leave empty handed, wishing you could take every last one home with you. If you are looking for a dog and live within an hour on Minneapolis, I strongly recommend this shelter. The people who run it, truly care for the animals they help.



We found a puppy that we thought would be perfect for us. We spent time playing with her and set up a time for the shelter to come see our home to make sure it was fit.

Within an hour, of leaving Nick's throat started to close. He had trouble breathing and was completely stuffed up. A week later Nick's doctor confirmed that Nick was highly allergic to dogs. The doctor recommended that we not get a puppy. Nick recommended that we look into hypoallergenic breeds.

I was not happy about the idea. I wanted a dog that could protect me and all I could imagine was a little puff ball that would be better in my purse than on a leash. I finally swallowed my ideas of what I thought I wanted and started looking at the possibilities.

I found miniature schnauzers to be a hypoallergenic breed that was known to be very sweet but protective. I saw a picture of a litter that was just born and fell in love. Nick was hoping for a West Highland Terrier. He grew up with a westie (as they are commonly called) and his whole family just absolutely loves the breed.

I was really hoping to get a rescue dog but after so much time and effort, I was exhausted and just ready to have my dog. I scheduled an appointment with a breeder and the day before we went to go meet the puppies, I received an email from Nick’s eleven-year-old cousin.

She was explaining that her family was moving to Germany on a military assignment and were going to have to give their dogs up for adoption. She went on to say that she knew Nick and I had been looking for a dog and was wondering if we would be interested in taking their dogs. Toby, a four-year-old miniature schnauzer and Duke, a ten-year-old westie. The exact two breeds we had been looking for.

It was a rescue of the best kind. We have had the boys for over a year now and every day I fall in love all over again.


Toby is a rascal. He is so much trouble but he is also the most loving dog I have ever known.



Duke is our old man. He’s stubborn and quirky but mellow and sweet. Everyday when I turn down my street after a long day at work, I feel my spirit pick up when I remember that as soon as I open the door, I will be greeted by those cute faces and wagging tails and for that I am so grateful.

I. What's in a Name? Last Call for the Blog Train

Somehow I missed the blog train. Here I was typing away in word doc or writing in *gasp* an actual journal. How middle school of me. The wonderful world of blog only came to me this last year. And when it came to me it hit hard like a mid-summer rainstorm in the Midwest- only not scary. I was introduced to a single amazing/inspiring/beautiful/ blog through a friend, which you can read about here. I was captivated by the story of this young woman (pretty much my age) and her undeniable strength and her wonderful family. I was hooked. I began to read her sisters blog, which you can read here. I started finding myself at blogs which I linked to through that blog and so forth. I started mentioning to friends and coworkers that I was looking at this blog or that blog and I was met with the realization that I was quite behind in the discovery of this linked world. Shoot! I have always been so on top of things. And the questions started to come as to why I did not have one. I was the one who was always writing. I did not have an answer. I already knew I wanted to connect and now this could be how.

What do I call it? How do you pick a name that in essence defines what you have to say to the world and at the same time somehow comes off sounding cute or even dare I say- clever. Too much pressure I bestow upon myself. Maybe I should just keep it simple. I think I need more of that in my life. Simplicity. Oh, I think I have something.

I have read so many blogs and as many as I view and as much as I am inspired by what I see and read, I must admit- I have yet to find myself in a blog. What I mean is that I am not the main character. Not yet. I am not married, I do not have children, I do not own a house, I am not very fashionable, I am not a very good cook. So out the window go so many of my favorite blog topics. What I have to offer are stories, thoughts, plans for some of the above items, and a need to write. Maybe I should start with what I do have. I have a loving boyfriend of almost five years, two highly entertaining dogs, a developing career, a supportive but distant family (1,390 miles away according to Google Maps), fabulous friends, and half a duplex. Not so bad.

So bear with me as I try to get a hang of this world in which more than my hard drive sees the vast array of jumbled thoughts and striving words. Maybe I will include some fiction pieces as well, might as well make them public somewhere. My hope is that writing to an audience with regular updates will clear some of the writing cobwebs and allow a deeper recognition of the simple things, everyday moments, that make life a little sweeter.